How the Relationship Style We Learned from Our Parents Influences Us as Adults in a Relationship9/3/2023
As children, we learn about relationships by watching our parents interact with each other. We see how they communicate, how they resolve conflict, and how they show love and affection. These observations become our template for how we expect relationships to work. If our parents had a healthy, loving relationship, we are more likely to have secure attachment styles as adults. This means that we feel confident in our ability to form close relationships and that we expect to be loved and supported by our partners. However, if our parents had an unhealthy or conflictual relationship, we are more likely to have insecure attachment styles. This means that we may have difficulty trusting others, may be afraid of abandonment, or may have a hard time expressing our emotions in relationships. Of course, our relationship style is not determined solely by our parents. Our own experiences and personality also play a role. However, our parents' relationship style can have a significant impact on how we approach our own relationships as adults. Generational Influence The generational influence on relationship styles is a complex topic. There are many factors that can contribute to how we learn about relationships from our parents, including their own attachment styles, their cultural background, and the historical context in which they grew up. For example, people who grew up in families where there was a lot of conflict may be more likely to have insecure attachment styles. This is because they may have learned that relationships are inherently unstable and that conflict is inevitable. On the other hand, people who grew up in families where there was a lot of love and support may be more likely to have secure attachment styles. This is because they may have learned that relationships are a source of comfort and security. It is also important to note that the generational influence on relationship styles can be passed down from generation to generation. This is because children learn about relationships from their parents, who learned about relationships from their parents, and so on. As a result, it is not uncommon for people to find themselves repeating the same relationship patterns that their parents did. This can be a challenge to break, but it is possible with awareness and effort. Here are some specific ways that the relationship style we learned from our parents can influence us in our adult relationships:
Remember, you are not doomed to repeat the relationship patterns you learned from your parents. With awareness and effort, you can create healthy, fulfilling relationships in your own life. Here are some additional tips for breaking the cycle of unhealthy relationship patterns:
If you need help with your relationship, contact Scott Olds at (303) 817-8369 or scott@springsnewhope.com.
As a psychotherapist and in my personal life, I have seen firsthand the impact that shame can have on caregivers for the chronically ill. Shame can be a powerful emotion that can lead to feelings of isolation, inadequacy, and worthlessness. It can also make it difficult to ask for help or support.
There are a number of reasons why caregivers may feel shame. They may feel ashamed of the illness itself, or of the way it has changed their lives. They may feel ashamed of their own limitations, or of the things they have to do to care for their loved one. They may also feel ashamed of the financial or emotional burden that the illness has placed on their family. Shame can have a significant impact on a caregiver's mental and physical health. It can lead to anxiety, depression, stress, and burnout. It can also make it difficult to cope with the demands of caregiving. If you are a caregiver for a chronically ill loved one, it is important to remember that you are not alone. There are many other caregivers who are going through the same thing. You are not to blame for the illness, and you are not inadequate. You are doing the best you can in a difficult situation. If you are struggling with feelings of shame, there are things you can do to cope. First, it is important to talk to someone about how you are feeling. A therapist can help you to understand your shame and develop coping mechanisms. You can also find support groups for caregivers, where you can connect with others who understand what you are going through. It is also important to remember to take care of yourself. Make sure to get enough sleep, eat healthy foods, and exercise regularly. You should also make time for activities that you enjoy. Taking care of yourself will help you to be better able to cope with the demands of caregiving. If you are struggling with feelings of shame, please know that you are not alone. There is help available. Please reach out for support. Here are some additional resources for caregivers who are struggling with shame:
If you are struggling as a caregiver and need help, contact Scott at (303) 817-8369 or scott@springsnewhope.com. As a psychotherapist, I have seen firsthand the emotional and psychological toll that chronic illness can take on individuals and their families. The physical symptoms of chronic illness can be debilitating, but the emotional and psychological effects can be just as challenging.
Some of the common emotional and psychological challenges that people with chronic illness face include:
If you are struggling to cope with the emotional and psychological effects of chronic illness, please reach out for help. There is no shame in seeking help, and it can make a big difference in your quality of life. Tips for Coping with the Emotional and Psychological Toll of Chronic Illness
To find out more, schedule an appointment with Scott Olds at (303) 817-8369 or email me at scott@springsnewhope.com. As a psychotherapist, I often work with highly sensitive people (HSPs) who struggle with anxiety. HSPs are individuals who process information more deeply and intensely than the average person. This can make them more susceptible to anxiety, as they are more likely to be overwhelmed by sensory stimuli and emotional triggers.
There are a number of ways that a psychotherapist can help an HSP manage anxiety. Here are a few of the most common:
Here are some additional tips for HSPs who are struggling with anxiety:
If you are a highly sensitive person (HSP) in an abusive relationship, you may feel overwhelmed, exhausted, and even hopeless. You may be wondering if you are crazy or if you are just too sensitive.
The truth is, you are not crazy. You are simply a highly sensitive person who has gotten into a relationship with an abuser. Abuse can take many forms, including physical, emotional, verbal, and financial abuse. As an HSP, you are naturally empathic and caring. You are drawn to people who are in need, and you want to help them. This makes you a prime target for an abuser. Abusers are often very good at manipulating and controlling others, and they can easily take advantage of your sensitivity. If you are in an abusive relationship, you may be experiencing some of the following:
If you are ready to get out of your abusive relationship, there are a few things you can do:
If you are a highly sensitive person in an abusive relationship, please know that you are not alone. There is help available. Please reach out to Scott Olds, Psychotherapist, for support. Here are some additional resources that you may find helpful:
Highly sensitive people can feel stressed, anxious, or depressed when overwhelmed with sensory overload, with too much happening around them too quickly. While no single activity is a silver bullet to well-being for the highly sensitive, research shows that a combination of these low-intensity positive activities contributes to harmony and well-being.
Be gentle with yourself. Embrace sensitivity for the positive benefits and learn to manage the challenges. These 10 practices can help you regain a sense of balance and calm when you feel overstimulated and overwhelmed. If you think you may be highly sensitive and need additional help overcoming anger, stress, or depression, call Scott Olds, Psychotherapist at (303) 817-8369 or Scott@springsnewhope.com for a free consultation. Scott is located in Arvada, Colorado. If you are experiencing anxiety, panic attacks, or depression, chronic insomnia frequently contributes to the problem. Highly sensitive individuals frequently experience sleep disturbances due to how they process stress. Here are some suggestions to help improve your sleep which will help your anxiety. Therapy can reduce the overwhelm and stress causing anxiety which will improve your sleep. Insomnia Puts You At Risk For Medical Conditions Insomnia is shown to put you at risk for a host of medical conditions, including: stroke, asthma, seizures, obesity, diabetes, high blood pressure, and heart disease. Insomnia also puts you at risk for mental health disorders, including depression, anxiety, panic attacks, anger, confusion, frustration, and emotional regulation in general. What causes insomnia?The causes of insomnia are many, including:
What can I do to manage insomnia?
When Should I Contact A Therapist?If you are experiencing stress, anxiety, panic attacks, or depression, a psychotherapist can help. Your therapist can help you uncover the root cause of your anxiety/depression and teach skills to better manage these issues.
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